When Notes Create Fear Instead of Clarity
When Notes Create Fear Instead of Clarity
I got this anonymous question from an employee:
“My manager just started taking detailed notes in all our 1-1’s. For a year, they never did this. Now I’m scared—am I on a performance plan?”
If you’ve ever felt that knot in your stomach, you’re not alone.
A sudden change in a manager’s behavior—especially one linked to documentation—can trigger anxiety.
Why? Because many employees have learned to associate “notes” with discipline.
Performance improvement plans (PIPs) often involve careful documentation, and once you’ve heard those stories, you start connecting the dots:
Notes = Documentation
Documentation = Trouble
Trouble = “I might be on my way out”
But is that always true?
Not at all.
This post explores:
Why managers take notes (the positive reasons).
Why employees worry when they see it.
How employees can ask about intent without fear.
How managers can explain the change and build trust.
Frameworks and scripts for both sides.
Why Managers Take Notes
There are many reasons a manager might start note-taking in 1-1’s:
Organization
Writing things down helps track projects, goals, and follow-ups.
No more relying on memory.Consistency
Notes keep managers fair across the team.
Without them, it’s easy to give one person more recognition than another.Support
Documenting wins, feedback, and development goals means nothing gets lost.
Notes are often a way to remember to celebrate you.Growth for the Manager
New managers especially use notes as a way to learn.
“What patterns am I missing? What have I already said?”Organizational Requirement
Sometimes HR introduces new guidelines: “All 1-1’s should be documented.”
The manager may just be adopting it late.
👉 In other words, note-taking does not always equal “problem.”
Often, it equals “structure.”
Why Employees Worry
If note-taking is so positive, why the fear?
Three reasons stand out:
Lack of Transparency
A sudden shift, with no explanation, feels like a red flag.Stories We’ve Heard
If you’ve seen or heard of colleagues on PIPs, you’ve learned: “notes = trouble.”Silence
When a manager doesn’t explain, the mind fills the blanks with the worst-case scenario.
📊 Research supports this: Amy Edmondson, a Harvard professor known for her work on psychological safety, has shown that lack of clarity in the workplace increases anxiety and reduces trust. Silence is rarely neutral—it usually creates fear.
How Employees Can Ask
It takes courage to ask your manager why they’re doing something new.
You want to be curious, but not sound scared.
You want to be honest, but not too forward.
Here are three approaches you can use:
🔎 Curious & Neutral
“I noticed you’ve started capturing notes in our 1-1’s—how would you like me to use them going forward?”
🗂 Honest & Professional
“I want to make sure I’m aligned. How do you see these notes supporting our conversations?”
🤝 Partnership-Oriented
“I think having notes could help me track progress too. Could we make this a shared record?”
These approaches frame the question as professional alignment, not personal worry.
What Managers Should Say
Here’s where the manager has to step in.
A thoughtful response sounds like this:
“Yes, it’s true—sometimes notes are also kept when someone is on a performance plan. But that’s not the case here. I’ve started documenting all my 1-1’s with everyone, so I don’t miss details and can support you better. You’ll also have access to the notes—we’ll use them as a shared record of your growth, not a secret file.”
Notice three things:
Acknowledgment: They admit the link to PIPs is real.
Clarity: They separate this situation from that fear.
Inclusion: They invite the employee into the process.
This simple explanation transforms fear into trust.
Framework: Explaining Behavioral Shifts
If you’re a manager making a change (like note-taking), use this 3-step framework:
Name the Change
“I’ve started writing notes in our 1-1’s.”Explain the Why
“It helps me track progress and support you better.”Invite Participation
“You’ll have access, and we can use this as a shared record.”
This doesn’t take more than a minute.
But without it, employees are left wondering for weeks.
The Bigger Lesson
This scenario highlights a universal truth in management:
🔑 Small changes in behavior create big ripples of interpretation.
Taking notes.
Turning the camera off in Zoom.
Replying late to an email.
Employees notice.
They interpret.
And often, they assume the worst.
The antidote?
Transparency.
Managers who explain their intent build psychological safety and stronger teams.
Practical Tips
For Employees:
Notice the change.
Ask with curiosity, not fear.
Suggest collaboration: “Could we share these notes?”
For Managers:
Announce changes before they cause confusion.
Acknowledge associations (like notes = PIP).
Turn private tools into shared growth resources.
Research & References
Amy Edmondson, The Fearless Organization: psychological safety drives trust and performance.
Gallup workplace reports: employees who trust their managers are 70% less likely to feel disengaged.
Harvard Business Review: transparency in communication reduces “perceived threat” in times of change.
Closing Reflection
One employee’s nervous question became a powerful reminder:
It’s not the notes that scare us.
It’s the silence around them.
A one-minute explanation can replace fear with trust.
That’s what leadership is—turning uncertainty into clarity.
So I’ll leave you with this:
👉 Managers: What’s one small change you made that unintentionally spooked your team?
👉 Employees: How do you ask about intent without sounding worried?
